flamby ✨🐝🔪
i like geese and i bark at mailmen
dumb shit: https://bsky.app/profile/did:plc:hx2spvwygxtfkniov6eore72/feed/aaaeoe2eg4czw
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- every time a baby yawns a puppy gets its wings
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- Reposted by flamby ✨🐝🔪do you guys hear that bell tolling? wonder who it’s for. it’s so loud lmao
- Reposted by flamby ✨🐝🔪Tired of everyone criticising me for my words and actions. What of my rich inner life? What of my pure intentions?
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- no one will ever love me the way sam loved frodo baggins
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- my baby screams when he poops and i think that's beautiful
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- Reposted by flamby ✨🐝🔪general tso’s classified documents
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- the nightmare before christmas is the blowout your baby had all over his christmas outfit
- the nightmare before christmas is trying to think of presents for your dad who hates everything
- Reposted by flamby ✨🐝🔪Pretending to be normal is exhausting.
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- good news! we're all going to die one day
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- Reposted by flamby ✨🐝🔪cheese ??
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- help i fell down a well and i've decided to stay
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- Reposted by flamby ✨🐝🔪actually—-and this is the truth—-we’re a little bit fucked
- dreams are pointless but nightmares are forever
- breaking news: i'm fucking broken.
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- maybe i'm finally broken enough to write something good
- in other news, it's terrible everywhere
- Reposted by flamby ✨🐝🔪"NO, YOU CANNOT HAVE CANDY FOR BREAKFAST!" my children yell at me.
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- Reposted by flamby ✨🐝🔪Alexa, how do you get wine stains off of a cat?
- getting off social media is self care. fortunately i do not care about myself
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- Reposted by flamby ✨🐝🔪I don't trust people who are out of the office with limited access to email. What the hell are you doing
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- a kaleidoscope made of pants getting wider and thinner across generations
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