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The Onion
theonion.com
“Instead of sitting through a stupid test and having to attend some boring oath ceremony, you take one tablet and instantly receive all the privileges you’d have had if you’d lived here all your life,” said President Donald Trump
TrumpRx Unveils $1 Million Citizenship Pill
WASHINGTON—Touting it as the fastest and most convenient way for people from foreign countries to be a part of the American Dream, President Donald Trump announced Friday that his direct-to-consumer w...
theonion.com
Feb 7, 2026 01:00
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