The Onion
America’s Finest News Source. A @globaltetrahedron.bsky.social subsidiary.
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- RFK Jr. Questions Efficacy Of Skin theonion.com/rfk-jr-questions-ef…
- Reptile Handler At Birthday Party Ruthlessly Heckled By 6-Year-Old For Showing Amphibian theonion.com/reptile-handler-at-…
- ICE Agent Scores Easy Win By Deporting Own Family theonion.com/ice-agent-scores-ea…
- 42 Years Ago Today: February 3, 1984 Front Page
- White House Denies Flickering, Green Trump A Hologram theonion.com/white-house-denies-…
- DOJ Releases Jeffrey Epstein Fragrance theonion.com/doj-releases-jeffre…
- Man Who Thought Fleetwood Mac’s ‘The Chain’ Was Over In For Thrill Of His Fucking Life theonion.com/man-who-thought-fle…
- The Onion’s Exclusive Interview With Gregory Bovino theonion.com/the-onions-exclusiv…
- “Doctors won’t tell you this, but you don’t need medication for a tapeworm—all you need is the natural power of friction,” Robert F. Kennedy Jr. said as he dropped to the floor, lifted his legs high, and dragged his ass along the White House carpet during a press conference.
