steph
personal acct
they/any pronouns
blog: stephastated64.tumblr.com
main: @tropicarcade.cool
- whooo said that
- it really does wonders for ones mental health to leave a space where you'll never be welcomed and allow yourself to heal and move on
- my luck with things has been so shit all day lol
- used my brain too much today catching up school work i'm exhausted
- i spent the past few days dissociating about my classes and thankfully the work load was doable but hopefully next week i can have a better pace
- a car dealership keeps calling me because i dared to look around on a website for prices and part of me wants to pick up next time and tell them "i have $5 and my nearly 20 yr old car to trade in is that enough?"
- the only way i'd get a more new used car rn is if i could trade in my old one for the down payment and pay like $200/month max but there's no way in hell that's happening with my credit
- server at restaurant: would you like water or sparkling water? me: oh, sparkling water! server: *drops a whole ass expensive ass bottle of sparkling water at our table*
- happy friday :) lol
- just submitted my public speaking intro video assignment that's been freaking me out all week (i feel weird being on camera and talking about myself when i'm not a vtuber LOL) and i feel a weight lifted.......
- if i can get through this week of assignments i'll feel better about things i think. it's so hard though. there's so many other things i want to do instead of schoolwork rn.
- the cats are very snuggly tonight cuz it's cold. kayden is sleeping near me on my side of the bed and it's comforting rn 🥺
- i hate how hard it is for me right now to get my brain focused back on classes after my winter break. the motivation is just not there. and idk what to do. maybe it'll get better? but i keep having the thought of "maybe just drop out, it's not for you"
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View full threadtw family death // but i know deep down it's fucking with me too. there was a lot of loss in my family in 2025 and it feels so unreal sometimes. i'll be ok, it's life, but damn.
- i've been trying so hard to forgive and be nice to myself for the low motivation and stress/anxiety with certain things. bad sleep schedule and struggling to keep up with chores. i feel so much guilt about it. i feel like a mess rn.
- and i don't want to just drop out of college again without a job or something lined up. i don't want to struggle and have to ask for donations or try to push more subs or whatever with streams because that shit makes me so miserable. i'd rather do literally anything else. so...idk i just feel stuck.
- tw family death // aside from all that, this time of the year has also been very rough for me mentally. it just passed 1 year since my grandmother suddenly passed and at the start of next month it'll be a year since my other grandmother passed. i've been coping by not thinking abt it/dissociating
- i've been trying over the past few months to find a job so maybe i could do college classes part time instead since it might be a little easier for me but i haven't heard back from any yet.
- if i'm honest with myself my motivation right now is in streaming and making stuff again. i feel the most fulfilled when i can do that and i can feel myself starting to get depressed because i know i can't focus on streaming while i'm taking classes.
- i want to learn things that will lead to a career but unfortunately it's also a survival thing at this point. i'm in college full-time and the grants and student loans help me get by. if I didn't have that i'm not sure what i would do.
- 😇
- we all deserve better than twitter
- i get creators deciding to stay if they have good reach there but i have better reach on tiktok and bsky at this point so like...i'm good lol
- tw family death // i'm lowkey in a bad headspace this holiday season. some classic stressors popping back up and it's almost been a year since i lost both of my grandmothers a month apart.
- tw family death // i also recently lost my great aunt and uncle a few months apart as well. one in august and one last week. i was around them a lot growing up and have a lot of holiday memories of them. just... there's been a lot of loss in my family this year. shit ain't fair.
- tw family death // i know it's just life. relatives get older, the older generations start to die, but man i never thought it would start to happen so fast. my grandma (mom's mom) i think was the most shocking because of how she passed suddenly and i think about and miss her probably the most.
- i can't wait until i can priv this account one day because man do i want to just uninstall twitter and never look back
- there's some other things i'm dealing with in my personal life too i'd rather not go into on any of my main channels but basically my family is being extremely cruel towards me lately and it hasn't been great
- feeling very emotionally numb rn
- hilarious. my bank account is almost $400 in the negative now because of overdraft fees.
- [This post could not be retrieved]
- bump
- putting out a lazy non-apology and then blocking anyone who doesn't buy it is some serious clown behavior and also proof you actually aren't sorry lol
- TAG YOUR FUCKING KINK SHIT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! OR USE THE KEYWORDS IN ALT TEXT!!!!!!!!! FOR THE LOVE OF GOD!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
- kink content i don't want to see keeps coming up on my main discover feed despite having relevant keywords muted and nsfw content turned off and that is so frustrating lol
- we need priv accounts on here so bad lol
- also the state of data entry/remote jobs rn sucks. i've been looking for months. it's either gatekeeping or scams targeting vulnerable ppl who need these jobs the most. i almost got scammed recently by someone telling me i was about to be paid 20/hr working from home and that really fucked with me.
- mmmm stress today
- not going into it bc personal but my family just fucking sucks and i'm tired
- i love karma so much <3
- i've been trying so hard to hold it together lately but extreme stress and depression about things going on in my own life and everything going on in this country rn has me so close to my fucking limit. my brain can't handle anything right now and i truly can't say for sure that i'll be ok.
- i haven't posted on here for a bit because tbh i feel like it's fine to post most things on main on bsky... i will prob use this a lot more once i can make this acct private
- thought i'd share this here too. i'm gonna start streaming again around my bday in may and would love insight and feedback about what everyone likes about my streams/would like to see/etc. sharing the post below is appreciated too! thank you!
- WATCH MY STREAMS? I'D LOVE YOUR FEEDBACK! 📈 my streams return in MAY 2025! leading up to my redebut, i thought i'd take some time to check in with a survey to get an idea of what folks like seeing from me. RESPONSES ARE ANONYMOUS and much appreciated! 💜 SURVEY LINK: docs.google.com/forms/d/e/1F...
- [Not loaded yet]
- not me just seeing this now that's me!!!!
- randomly decided to see what they have at crumbl this week and there's a rob's backstage popcorn/jonas bros collab cookie...so uhhh brb
- it was Just Ok tbh more than anything it made me want actual popcorn LOL
- protein pancake cup save me
- JOE JONAS IN 18 DAYS!!!!!!!!!
- underappreciated post smh
- the song...the song has restored my strength... open.spotify.com/track/2xijXb...
- how am i supposed to stay up til midnight for the new marshmello x jobros tonight i'm so sleepy
- someone out there must have pokemon cards signed by joe jonas and i want one
