Found a couple of technical plot holes in "Weird Science."
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I don’t consider myself an avid reader but boy do I love reading too much into things
Has it ever rained normally in a film.
Me: Sometimes I'll call my calf muscles my mooscles lol
Personal trainer: *crying* I will literally pay you to find somebody else to do this
The sound of the vacuum cleaner discovering an errant Christmas ornament hook. Ah, Christmas in July.
In the darkest times, may the silliest things amuse you.
Fetus is short for feet r us
*explaining to a growing audience at a party how my intermittent binging diet works*
Big fan of both chittering and squelching thanks to subtitles.
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I’m going for a walk.
I’m meeting a friend for coffee.
I’m doing the combination walk & meet a friend for coffee.
"Great. I'll bring my accordion" ~ me whenever I'm invited somewhere
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why did they have to make waterboarding sound so fun
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How does each day distinguish themself from the other without recognition of the one before and acceptance of all of them heretowith and off we go again together?
Here have a fish 🐟
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Stark reminders could benefit from a few throw pillows.
*Cut to me crushing butter mints to snort lines with the elderly.
I'm not a brand. I'm an idiot.
February 2 is almost here and if the groundhog sees his shadow on a tree, it means sycamore weeks of winter.
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it’s just you and me against the world, deformed hot dog bun
Why are they called dating website usernames and not ‘love handles’
Would you think less of me if you knew I paid a woman to scream obscenities at me in French whilst hurling cans of Dinty Moore beef stew at my head?
*flicking a lit cigarette* im not like other Muppet babies
A sandwich sandwiched between 2 other sandwiches is called a Mandelbrot Club and is illegal to make or even think about
What wine pairs with totalitarianism?
I propose a toast.
Sourdough. With butter.
Hold on now your house was in the MIDDLE of the street? Madness!
hey fuck off with your
being younger and cooler
than me bullshit okay
The "stay vaguely sane" drug in his system just ran out.
The moon doesn't care. I love the moon.
I’m a bad influence but a heck of a good time
I'm loving these posts from Ohio people. "Gonna be just another day here" and to that idea. It makes me laugh. It's been a damn long time since we've seen 10" of snow in one drop. People have forgotten how to deal with that.
Gonna be fun to watch.
I'm driving and my stupid puffy coat is in my way and I have a wedgie and then St. Elmo's Fire comes on the radio so I look at myself in the rear view mirror and I say to myself, well, aren't you just an asshole.
The literary bots are running amok.
Canadian winter hits different and I guess for my first one it decided to show off. I can’t go outside without my blood freezing. Well played, Canada.
Maybe not brain fog but definitely a light mist.
I’m basically always at my best, which unfortunately, is exactly the same thing as my worst, because my constant baseline is, “terrible.”
An under-appreciated reason for why dogs are so awesome: they’re called “pooches.” I mean, come on. That’s a top 10 English language word right there. So go give your pooch a smooch! (But not on the cooch!)
Your English teacher and your gym teacher are both on paid administrative leave pending an investigation into allegations they had sex on the principal's desk.
My parents are divorced so we have two January 6ths
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