Chase Lazration
I'm Promethean, Not Epimethean
- Watching The Orville for the first time. When does 500 cigarettes happen?
- oops I stood up to pee and the fireflies came back.
- I think my ulcerative colitis is acting up, because every time I drink coffee my tummy hurts. I'm not going to stop drinking coffee.
- I don't have money. Why am I looking at plane tickets to Scotland?
- They're not law enforcement, they're government issued domestic terrorists.
- They should invent a wretched, horrifying vtuber.
- The only thing keeping me from being an adult is the fact that I still bother my mother.
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- "This page is slowing down Firefox. To speed up your browser, stop this page." Sir this is the GOOGLE HOMEPAGE.
- I really want to try one of those period cramp simulator devices because I wholeheartedly believe I could power through it. If women can do it, so can I.
- The secret is to drink so early in the afternoon that your hangover starts before you go to bed, then you can wake up and be fine.
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- Sometimes I think "Maybe I will give 2024 D&D a try" but then I remember some random thing about it and I immediately start hating it again.
- When I was a kid, I was so terrified of zombie movies that I didn't realize Zombieland was a comedy.
- Tumblr users will post a poll with an "other" option and then disable comments
- i should write a story with homoerotic undertones but instead of banging, one of the men just slaughters the other. it's not even a fair fight.
- Tidings of comfort and JOI
- I think I should be able to hunt tumblr users for sport
- I am very full of spaghetti.
- Just minced a clove of garlic and added it, still raw, to my bowl of spaghetti. God, I love garlic.
- I'm pretty much a celebrity now
- "That's 15x the average viewer" I paid for YouTube Premium, so I'm gonna get as much value from it as I possibly can.
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- I love RvB but I wish people would shut the fuck up about Caboose. I get that he's the lovable idiot, but there's like 20 other characters.
- Oh Markarth Vendor Chest, how I've missed you.
- "en esta economia" has been permanently added to my lexicon.
- I might uninstall the Skyrim Unofficial Patch just for the nostalgia of glitching outside Whiterun and accessing the vendor chests.
- When I say I come from a predominantly white area, this is what I mean.
- I'm not attracted to men, but it's such a non-issue that I'd fuck (or get fucked by) a dude if we were super chill and he asked nicely.
- Who wants to come over for a hot dog date? (We eat hot dogs together)
- The weather is getting colder. It's finally Autism
- I'm glad they fired me
- I need a thirty-something year old woman to hold me and tell me that I matter to her.
- Fesshole is a fun account to look at, but it's so British that it physically hurts me.
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