A shadowy flight into the dangerous world of a nerdy writer, editor, motorcycle rider, ham radio geek, former van lifer, and current all-around weirdo. Writer at Jalopnik, ADVRider, and elsewhere. a.k.a. Smokey Da Van, Knerd Rider.
Been playing Schedule 1. I customized my van. 😎
Manufacturers still want to sell us the hardware, then charge us more every month to actually use it. Ownership is irrelevant. Nothing is real anymore.
BMW Keeps Pushing Subscriptions Even After Realizing Heated Seats Were 'Probably Not The Best Way' - Jalopnik
BMW received significant pushback after introducing the concept of subscription-based heated seats, but they haven't given up. Driver aids are next.
This is why I'm still running the crummy head unit with a tiny screen my Transit came with. It was easy to replace my E250's double-DIN radio with an Apple CarPlay unit. I had Google Maps on my dashboard in my 2004 E250, but adding it to my 2021 Transit would be a nightmare. That's not progress.
‘You Wanna Know Why Techs Are Leaving?’: Mechanic Has To Replace Ford Radio. Then He Realizes What He Has To Do To Fix It
A mechanic got a warranty job to replace a Ford radio. He says it's 'ridiculous' how much work it takes and that this is why techs are leaving the industry.
These families have suffered enough without wondering how, when, or even if they'll get these cars back.
Minneapolis Area Towing Company Returns Abandoned Cars To Families For Free After ICE Abductions - Jalopnik
In some cases, the tow company will find the abandoned cars themselves, and ask for the community's help to figure out who owns them and where they should go.
This is far from the first way I'd think of to stop a robbery in progress.
Bystander Stops Jewelry Heist By Crashing Thieves' Getaway Car Into Jewelry Store - Jalopnik
Jewelry store robbers left their getaway car running, and a bystander saw that as an opportunity to thwart the crime by crashing the car into the store.
If Jeff Bezos could afford to spend $75 million on the Melania movie & $500 million for a yacht to sail off to his $55 million wedding to give his wife a $5 million ring, please don't tell me he needed to fire one-third of the Washington Post staff.
Democracy dies in oligarchy.
This is the best video game soundtrack I've heard since Interstate 76.
Schedule I OST - Adventures In Grassland
YouTube video by RGisOnline
I'd love to see a WRC event in the US. I'd love to go work it as a volunteer, because those are the best seats in the house (source: years of experience doing exactly that). Maybe this effort will go better than last time.
FIA Toys With Our Feelings Once Again As It Considers A U.S. World Rally Championship Event For The 5th Year In A Row - Jalopnik
The FIA has been teasing us about this event for the past five years, and it still hasn't happened.
Google, Apple, they’re all doing it. It’s no coincidence they’re throwing ads at you for things you’ve talked about but never searched for.
Do you remember when people were saying "I think my phone is listening to me, i'm getting ads for stuff I spoke about" and people said "They arent listening to you, they're just this good at predicting your interests"?
Well, it happens they were doing exactly that.
www.cbsnews.com/news/google-...
Google to pay $68 million over allegations its voice assistant eavesdropped on users
Class-action lawsuit alleged that Google's voice assistant illegally recorded and shared private conversations with advertisers.
What a mess. Since I wrote this, the state says drivers will have until April 10 to get their cars inspected. That is, unless the EPA issues a waiver and they get rid of inspections entirely, as originally planned. Like I said, what a mess.
New Hampshire Car Inspections Are Back, Lawmakers Seek Creative Ways Around Them - Jalopnik
NH motorists probably feel like they're watching Bugs Bunny and Daffy Duck arguing over whether it's duck season or rabbit season.
My first thought when I saw this was the "This is fine" meme.
This Is Fine: Drunk Florida Man Attempts To Drive Burning Car With Wife Inside - Jalopnik
This is the precise opposite of how you should handle a car fire.
Taking care of unfinished business.
Restored Subaru S209 Hits The Track For Tribute Laps Six Years After Owner Killed By Drunk Driver - Jalopnik
Friends of a man killed by a drunk driver while changing a flat tire have restored his totaled Subaru S209 and are headed to the track to honor his memory.
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The "fastest woman in the world" ended up going a bit too fast.
Olympic Runner Sha'Carri Richardson Arrested For Driving Too Fast As Life Imitates Sport - Jalopnik
Richardson was caught doing 104 mph just outside Orlando, Florida, which qualified for Florida's new super speeder law.
Still representing the 617, yo.
Boston Residents Use Trash Cans, Tables, Chairs To Save Hard-Earned Parking Spaces After Snowstorm - Jalopnik
It's lot of work to dig your car out after a snow storm, so Boston residents place all sorts of things in the street to reserve their unearthed parking spots.
The day when someone exercises their Second Amendment right to defend their home from agents not respecting their Fourth Amendment rights will be an interesting day, indeed.
It's not a remote kill switch as the fear mongers claim. But the technology isn't yet trustworthy, and could lock sober drivers out of driving their own cars with no recourse.
Congress Votes Not To Repeal Mandatory Kill Switch That Isn't Really A Kill Switch - Jalopnik
An attempt at repealing the kill switch mandate for cars built after 2026 has failed, so devices aimed at curbing drunk driving may be on their way soon.
No take-backsies!
Man Accused Of Stealing Back Cars He Sold On Facebook Has Got This Supply-Demand Thing Figured Out - Jalopnik
He now faces eight counts of forgery and six counts of first-degree tampering with a motor vehicle, allegedly making more than $24,000 off his victims.
We don't know much so far. Here's what we do know, sort of, except where official accounts even contradict each other.
Plane Crashes In Maine During Snowstorm, At Least 6 Dead - Jalopnik
Weather is one of many factors the NTSB will be investigating, and it is far from the only potential cause of the crash.
Texas has the simplest, most boring license plates in the US, and is surprised when people can fake them so easily. Yet their previous designs were great! Colorful! Artistic! A genuine representation of Texas! And much more difficult to fake!
Texas Still Struggles With Fake License Plates After Eliminating Paper Temp Tags - Jalopnik
While dealers may sometimes complain about change, it seems they were right in this case.
It sounds like a Dungeons and Dragons wizard casting "Create Gasoline," but the process is rooted in science and may have small-scale applications.
New York Startup Builds Fridge-Sized Machine That Can Turn Air Into Gasoline - Jalopnik
While it's not quite the free energy it sounds like at first, Aircela's technology in its current state has some practical, small-scale applications.
Imagine getting pulled over and asked for your license, registration, and proof of insurance -- on your e-bike. That's about to happen in New Jersey.
New Jersey Passes Law Requiring License, Registration, And Insurance For E-Bikes - Jalopnik
On his last day in office, outgoing Governor Phil Murphy signed the law in response to an increasing number of e-bike crashes and fatalities.
It’s easy to tell which cats have never seen snow before, and which has been there, done that.
#catskyHe is not the hero we asked for, but he is the hero we need.
Meet the Alaska Student Arrested for Eating an AI Art Exhibit
A conversation with Graham Granger, whose combination of protest and performance art spread beyond campus. “AI chews up and spits out art made by other people.”
I didn’t realize my mother-in-law’s washing machine was a Ford.
AI slop is everywhere these days, and this one slipped by. Hopefully, they learn from this mistake. It's too easy to use AI to cover dents, rust, torn seats, and other damage in photos that people rely on to represent the car accurately.
Bring A Trailer Accidentally Lists An AI-Altered Cadillac For Sale - Jalopnik
AI slop is everywhere these days, and it can be hard to tell what's real, digitally altered, or completely fabricated.
It's not that people don't like it. People love it. But it's made in Mexico, subject to tariffs, and more expensive for Mazda to make. So they make less of them and nudge people toward the American-made CX-50 instead, which is only slightly more expensive.
The Mazda CX-30's Sales Decline Had Nothing To Do With Its Popularity - Jalopnik
Mazda decided to scale back production of the CX-30 because it's built in Mexico and thus subject to Trump's tariffs.
E-bikes ride a fine line between technology and simplicity for the Amish.
Some Amish Communities Are Adopting E-Bikes Instead Of Horses - Jalopnik
Roughly two-thirds of Amish churches now allow e-bikes.
When is a courtesy not a courtesy? When you’re in Philadelphia.
Philadelphia's 'Courtesy Tow' Loses Cars Instead Of Providing A Courtesy - Jalopnik
Courtesy parking sounds less like a courtesy and more like legalized extortion.
I can never resist a good pun.
Manual Transmission Thwarts Thieves' Attempt To Steal A Woman's (Kia) Soul - Jalopnik
We've seen manuals thwart thieves before, but what's unique about this case is that it's not the first time this has happened to her in this car.
I love putting cars into the most inappropriate situations possible. This is one of those times.
Here's Why Road Tripping A Kei Truck Is A Great Terrible Idea - Jalopnik
This video is the classic formula of traveling a long distance to buy a questionable vehicle, then immediately driving it home.
"Minnesota drivers urged to stay safe on icy roads"
That's one way to warn people about what's going on in Minneapolis these days....
Winter warning: Minnesota drivers urged to stay safe on icy roads
As winter sets in, drivers face the risk of sliding into ditches or stalling on icy roads.
I just thought I’d share this for no particular reason.
This is more important for navigation than knowing what time it is. GPS works because of highly accurate atomic clocks, and a similar system around the moon is likely someday. Figuring out what time it is there and how to reconcile it with Earth time is a step on the way toward that.
China Is Over The Moon With Its New Lunar Timekeeping System - Jalopnik
If the Chinese have figured out a highly accurate system, the mathematics involved are valid regardless of who writes the software that runs it.
Oops.
Hundreds Of Cars Contaminated After Supplier Error Puts Diesel In Gas Pumps - Jalopnik
Drivers affected by the mix-up should contact the gas station where they got the contaminated fuel, as well as the Colorado Division of Oil and Public Safety.
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It's about time. And not just where Tesla's concerned, although it was Tesla that started this terrible trend. Any safety system should be as simple as possible to reduce its chance of failing when you need it most, which is exactly what these electronic door handles are doing.
Congress Proposes 'SAFE Exit Act' To Change Terrible Tesla-Style Door Handles - Jalopnik
Hopefully, the laws will finally catch up to reality.
The only problem with this idea is that horses exist, which people have already been riding for thousands of years.
Kawasaki Wants To Literally Reinvent The Horse With Its Corleo Mobility Vehicle - Jalopnik
Kawasaki aims to make the Corleo available to purchase by 2035.
