Jakylln Heidi
I upcycle and sew and worry
linktr.ee/jakyllnheidi
- The justified rage and hunger for vengeance simmering inside of me sees and acknowledges the justified rage and hunger for vengeance simmering inside of you
- Auditioning a second person to join me in a drag king duo as B & J Deen, The Deen Brothers; a pair of tv writers in LA who genuinely write for tv. They are everything executives want in their big budget tv writers: two average white guys with, and this is very important, a catchy team name.
- I think I only like art that took 20 years to complete and ultimately cost the artist a significant part of their former identity.
- If god didn’t want me to stay out drinking till 2am then why tf would they make my hair look so good when I do it
- We’re all adults. We could decide to reschedule the holiday season so that it doesn’t overlap with cold and flu season.
- I love when I see a tweet that went viral in 2011 pop up in a meme carousel on Instagram like oh good the children are still studying the classical internet philosophy texts
- So this is Christmas And what have you done You’re a pink pony girl And you dance at the club
- I can only practice daily positive affirmations if I stage them as reality TV confessionals with the over-accessorized outfits & cameras and everything and only then can I talk about how hard I work and how much I deserve to be here
- I have no Spotify wrapped to share with you. But I do have 93 partial screen recordings of songs from TikTok I meant to look up later and .56 GB storage left on my phone
- Stories about mech suits are NOT for children Stories about mech suits are for world weary adults who long for the back support of a strong exoskeleton
- They should put a highly paid, licensed, and experienced teacher with expertise in K-12 education in Fortnite
- Why does live action Moana have her hair styled like a Mormon wife
- —> starts using email to avoid being scammed by spam phone calls —> starts using text messages to avoid spam promotional emails —> starts using phone calls to avoid scammy and spammy text messages (repeat until expiration)
- Weird Al Yankovich biographical Broadway musical but it’s just a beginning to end parody of Jersey Boys
- [Not loaded yet]
- -you’re dropping off during designated donation hours (donations are often processed in a different area to make sure they’re clean/safe to sell. Insisting the cashier take your bag of mysteries because you didn’t look up the donation hours ahead of time is rude)
- “I asked chat gpt” Yeah well I gave the haunted doll faces hands so they can open your doors at night to ask wtf is wrong with u
- While I agree that the internet is so terrible now that we should all abandon it to rot i regret to inform you that some folks are still posting pictures proudly showing off what they’ve harvested in their gardens and unfortunately that content still slaps
- When someone gives a computer a prompt and calls the resulting amalgamation of stolen pixels their “art” it feels emotionally the same as being shown someone’s wine night vision board. Like, you got some neat ideas there, pal. But you haven’t actually done anything worth showing off.
- wdym your child is dressed as my high school subculture for halloween? this was never supposed to happen to me only to generations before me
- Please perceive me but please do it without perceiving me but whatever you do please do not stop not persisting to perceive me thankssomuch
- a small, boisterous, rosacea-cheeked man, the bells dingling from his checkered hat, sputtering into a podcast mic that jester’s privilege does not exist
- Times like these mean I’m either going to get really into baking pies or smoking cigarettes. I can’t afford either pastime, but tradition dictates I must pick one.
- I give up I’m not painstakingly removing all the husky fur out of my crochet pieces anymore I’m calling it 98% cotton 2% domestic wolf hair and then I’m calling it a day
- Offering to cook for others: You matter to me so I want you to enjoy a nice meal. When others offer to cook for me: You matter to me so I want you to avoid trying to solve the series of frustrating moving puzzles known as my food allergies.
- Deeply troubled that our government is painting two white suburbanite dads to be the epitome of pearl clutching edgy humor my god they’re not even garage band dads they’re multiple newspaper subscription dads who look like they’d be flabbergasted by a flash tattoo
- Awards Shows: We are gathered here tonight to honor the hard work and dedication of these select artists in particular, who we want to honor for their craft and the legacies they are creating in the world of film Also Awards Shows: you artists better shutthefuckup I swear to god I’ll drown your f—
- Sailor Moon is a Good Show because most of the time the episode message is “don’t trust anybody trying to sell you anything they are trying to steal your energy” and I think that’s beautiful
- It is Super Bowl Sunday 2012. You post “what is a football?” on tumblr and 6 of your friends like it. One even reposts it. This is the greatest joy you will ever know on the internet.
- Just finished this robe and I love it so much it’s going to be the centerpiece of my personality now #sewing #thriftedfabric #slowfashion #upcycling
- [Not loaded yet]
- Thank you!
- [Not loaded yet]
- I have the sweetest fiancé who writes the best words
- Tried changing things up and slept with my head angled 0.0067 degrees to the left of where I usually do, and now I can’t move my entire upper torso
- In light of current political events, I’ve decided to end my personal journey towards trying to be nicer to men. I can see now that the choice was a mistake and I never should have stopped making men uncomfortable online and in real life.
- GOD WHAT HAVE YOU DONE YOURE A PINK PONY GIRL AND YOURE HOLDING A GUN
- Oh that file labeled “Bob’s Burgers Spec Script” is just a series of long descriptions of the worst fates I can imagine happening to Jimmy Pesto. I don’t know if it’ll ever get me hired on a show as it’s currently 373 pages long
- It has come to my attention that Oscar de la Renta has been dressing fascists these days. I only liked that fashion house cuz Oscar incorporated so many florals into his designs. But he died in 2014 and a fashion house can’t own the concept of florals. It’s just a company and companies can burn.
- Aww heck yes 🤘 Complete Oscar de la Renta dress & robe set, made from thrifted bedsheets #slowfashion #upcycle #thrift
- When I got to the “I’m a peanut bar and I’m here to say” style rap verse halfway through, I put the book down and never picked it up again I did, however, enjoy Neil Stephenson’s Seveneves & I recommend that book to every person who enters my home
- Y’all like scrunchies? #sewing #embroidery
- Wearing your emotions on your sleeve is out This year is all about wearing your anxiety on your cuticles
- All any girl wants for Valentine’s Day is the head of a billionaire
- If you’re interested, let’s be mutuals! 🪴 - gardening 🪼 - underwater aliens “🪴” - “gardening” 🤘 - using the iconography of satanism but worshiping no male deities 👻 - ghosts 💅 - queer stuff a🚕 - being relentlessly mean to fascists 🪡 - sewing
- I am GAMER G - going to A - ask my partner to play M - the parts I’m not E - good at I just like R - puzzles
- Now playing: Infinity Nikki!* *scrolling my phone, waiting for my fiancé to come do the tricky part chasing this whimstar so I can go back to playing dress up
- This is also the reason why, most of the time, knitters are lovely folks with a nice hobby, and crocheters are like “I wanted to experiment with body horror in this next piece.”
- Some of my crochet pieces 💖
- Omg my homemade window greenhouse box worked omg look at my baby jalapeños
- Instagram is dead and photo slideshow parties are reborn from its ashes
- 1 hour and a half without TikTok
- There’s so many more important things going on right now But I saw a bucket hat for sale with a picture of a rooster and the word Cock next to it and tbh that hat will be all I am thinking about for the next 2.5 months
- Trying to keep my modest TikTok following informed on where they can find me if we lose the app, also thoroughly distracted by my anxiety over my city burning, I ended up making an algorithmically unfriendly video wherein I called the new app Redbook. Goodbye modest TikTok following. I’ll miss you 😢
