chubby bannister
a surplus woman
Che Guevara and Debussy to a disco beat
- Memories of mum: she taught me to skim stones
- Only jokin’
- And she’s lost weight without trying. Sometimes I wonder why I’m friends with her
- My friend has just been dumped. She’s miserable even though she wanted to do it too. She has acknowledged that I should be more upset at this time. But I’m all good right now. It’s quite funny actually (not out loud obviously)
- When you’re talking with a friend and they suddenly get absorbed in their phone. I stop speaking half way through a sentence just to see… They look up and a different conversation is started. Sure, okay 🤷🏻♀️
- My poor, pretty car, freshly valeted driving along B roads in the rain 😞
- The ice dancing is on. Not my favourite skating discipline. Too showy and not graceful ⛸️
- Learning about the death of a Instagram person I followed and liked. A shock to read because she appeared young and very healthy (no details provided as it’s private so of course I won’t speculate). Having a hard time processing death at the moment, it seems
- The diversity of police officers in Toronto is pretty… um… lacking
- I know they’ve introduced some new sports but not sure about the competitive element of this. And who judges?
- Memories of mum: how I learned the tooth fairy didn’t exist when she absentmindedly pulled the package I’d carefully wrapped in kitchen towel the night before out of her cardigan pocket while we were watching Newsround
- Resurrecting my curling knowledge every 4 years 🥌
- “It’s Curling. It’s Your Vibe” 🤨
- If it’s Thursday it must be tiny penised men driving their vroom vroom cars up and down the prom night
- Oh. And early Winter Olympics. The fuckers
- Oh fuck. There’s rugby on
- After a big day of adulting I took myself off for a massage. Crikey, did I need that. My poor body
- What a load of old piffle Seven Dials is
- The quaintest element of registering a birth or death is that the certificate has to be signed using a fountain pen 🖋️
- As difficult experiences go being able to see friends when registering a parent’s death is the softest landing one could ask for. Me and the registrar welling up sharing stories of loved ones and big hugs. I am a very lucky girl at times
- Possible bigamy being exposed at the front desk of the register office
- You have to admire the vocal capabilities of the neighbourhood foxes when they’re fucking at half 1 in the morning. Is it true about the spiky penis or is it that it is too cold to be indulging in this sort of behaviour
- That is a new strange noise being made by the neighbourhood Foxy Loxy. Sounds like he’s swinging on a rusty gate
- Midnight at the Oasis has been an ear worm for several days because of that Catherine O’Hara & Fred Willard clip
- Reposted by chubby bannisterwent to type "Isambard Kingdom Brunel" and my phone autocorrected it to "Islamabad Kingdom Brunel", and anyway who would like to book my new, incredibly niche and very culturally insensitive drag act
- Reposted by chubby bannisterIt is worth recalling that the position of U.K. Ambassador to the US was not vacant at the time the Prime Minister chose to appoint Peter Mandelson to the role. A highly competent and respected woman was replaced.
- One for the kids there
- I am not a project. I am a work stream

- Inadvertently buying roses for myself. Remembering they were one of my mum’s favourites. Suddenly seeing the death through the eyes of my cousin who was so fond of mum
- Well, that’s a new one. Overwhelmed by tears in M&S car park
- I had last night’s pudding for dinner (doggy bag after the carvery). It was a decent slice but of course now I’m feeling hungry
- Just seen a nice little sheepskin jacket I’d like. One pound off a grand. Nah, don’t like it that much
- Just spent two hours on Zoom with my American cousin. Talking about my mother amongst other things. She has some lovely memories of how warm and twinkly she was. That makes me happy
- Don’t support kids. Support pubs. That’s a catchy slogan
- I really hope I don’t end up smacking the new person in our team
- Just realised it’s two weeks today
- Lots of good progress made with funeral preparations. Dad doing sterling work today on his own
- Post lunch slump, not helped by having to read boring documents 🥱
- Reposted by chubby bannister"Nearby, a six-year-old wondered if the unicorn she saw marching earlier was ok. "
- And now we know the purpose. A preemptive attempt at damage limitation before the rest of the slurry seeped out. Be off with you Mandelson. I fail to think of anything you touched that didn’t turn to utter shit
- Who brings a vegan to a carvery? I wish that was the start of a joke
- She looked so frail in the Emmy’s footage from last September
- My Instagram feed is still stuffed with poignant, heartfelt tributes to Catherine O’Hara
- Finally had a dream about my mother. And it was mighty odd
- Reposted by chubby bannisterCASABLANCA was released 84 years ago. One of the biggest and most iconic films to ever come out of Hollywood, the story behind the scenes is like the beginning of a beautiful friendship… 1/53
- Going for carvery tonight and I’m not even sorry
- But there is a gasp across Bluesky
- Assumed the night manager has ended as there was no trailer on the RadMac show