Kym Kral
Awkward and Awesome~the only way I know how to do things 💕✨
www.kymkral.com
- Does Jonathan Ross have internal bleeding the way Trump was shot in the ear?
- Just had my annual mammogram. If every man had to deal with these, we would solve breast cancer by lunch.
- Oh how I love this cold weather. My comfy socks are on, the space heaters are out, I’m wearing the sweatpants that I gaslit this guy Jon into giving me when we slept together two years ago, hot cocoa in my hands.. Life is good ❤️
- I love that my social media feeds are take down the patriarchy and this fascist regime, AWESOME women, The Denver Broncos and cats! 10/10. No notes. 🤌💋
- I just watched a woman throw her mask out of her car window leaving the doctor’s office. VERY intentionally. We really are the virus.
- I miss the days I didn’t know who Erika Kirk was.
- Do you think Keanu Reeves and Pedro Pascal are buddies? I feel like that’s a friendship we all need right now.
- Humans are exhausting.
- You know what I think about like once a week? This random guy who repeatedly slid into my DMs to ask me to pee on him turned out to be a MASSIVE Trump supporter. Who’s surprised?
- The generation who taught us to keep our elbows off the table also thought trickle down economics was a great idea. So you’re free, put your elbows on the table!
- Don’t waste your time on regret. Call that person, go after that dream job, buy your cat that Baby Bjorne, strap him to your chest and show him this big beautiful world.. The sky isn’t even the limit!
- Reposted by Kym Kral🔥🔥🔥🔥 📺 YouTube: tinyurl.com/54b42u2y 🔊 Spotify: tinyurl.com/ydmeezty 🍏 Apple: tinyurl.com/384ebdbj 🎙️ MP3: tinyurl.com/z4uj9vdr 🔴 Patreon: bit.ly/2Oo1JQ6
- Reposted by Kym KralTODAY! @kymkral.bsky.social is here for a mile high time! We talk about a monkey carrying ALL of the diseases on the loose in MS. Then we try a mocktail made by a new dad who can't wait to get drunk with his baby. Finally, Kym takes us through her CO hometown where a cannibal is buried! Lynx-N-Reply
- At this point, The Sizzler has to be a business front. Right? There’s an absurd amount of them and as far as I can tell they’re all always pretty empty.
- Anyone else think they’re opening an investigation into democrats on the list in order to avoid releasing it? If there’s an active investigation, they can’t share evidence. These survivors deserve justice and closure and peace. Pleaae tell me I’m wrong. What a dark fucking time.
- Also, let me add that the fact that this has become political is absolutely disgraceful. I, like most people, do not care the political affiliation of the monsters on this list. Take. Them. All. Down.
- And let the mental gymnastics begin.. Up first- Megyn Kelly! Jesus. Fucking. Christ.
- Your employees not smiling enough is definitely not why profits are down, Target. www.usatoday.com/story/grocer...
- Bless a quiet Lyft driver that drives in a way you’re pretty sure you might die but if you don’t, you’ll get to the airport with plenty of time to eat a $45 salad 🤗🩷
- All this would be a smidge easier to swallow if people weren’t blindly following slash worshiping slash protecting such a narcissistic idiot who likely wears a diaper.
- I haven’t felt this much hope in a year. Congratulations @zohrankmamdani.bsky.social 🤍❤️💙
- Do you think Mike Johnson roots for The Empire when he watches Star Wars?
- Imagine dreaming of being a lawyer, working your heart out, going to law school and then making loads of money protecting rapists and pedophile.
- My Roman Empire is that I, an atheist, have more Christian values than actual “Christians”.
- Don’t send me long DMs about what I post. I don’t care and I won’t read them. Get a diary.
- We are at a place now where standing up for pedophiles is just “a difference in opinion” and calling a Nazi a Nazi is mean spirited and “woke”. I truly feel like I’m going crazy.
- I need to stop making friends with my lyft drivers. These coffee and hike dates that I always flake on are starting to get out of hand.
- My two biggest social media posts that are going around right now are about being a “poop-pants ally” and how women should get to run everything for 10 years. I could not be prouder 💩🩷🫶
- When I was 23 years old, I complained to my then “boyfriend” that men were always catcalling and being creepy. He said “don’t worry, sweetheart, 24 out the door.” I got so excited and knew it was not the argument he thought it was. Turns out he was super wrong. Do better, men.
- MAGA controls all branches of the government. Any shutdown is completely on them. The gaslighting & blatant lying is so unreal. They’re also delaying the swearing in of a newly elected democrat who would be the tie breaking vote to release the Epstein files. The mental gymnastics must be exhausting.
- Why don’t we see if Trump can pronounce “Mifepristone” before we decide to have the FDA review it.
- Happy Happy Alice and Borderlands AND SVU Day, to those who celebrate!!! 🤗🤗🤗
- I think we should let women run everything for 10 years. After 10 years, if it’s not better, we’ll give it back and you can continue with your wars, and outbursts and other dangerous (awful) tiny man bullshit.
- Reposted by Kym Kral
- I’m curious how many of you think the rapture is happening today—especially after seeing how many of you spent the last few weeks defending, justifying and celebrating a racist podcaster’s life’s work.
- I know there are way bigger things happening right now, but why is the Duolingo owl sad?! Are these two things related?!
- Reposted by Kym KralGonna go on Shark Tank and pitch “free speech.”
- Buckle up, friends. Fascism is here 💔🙁
- Listening to 3 boomer aged strangers at the airport bonding about how expensive and hard the world is now and kids these days… it’s taking all I have not to yell “Your generation did this! At least own it!”
- It’s hard to be kind when so many of the headlines have some sort of “white supremacist” descriptor before reporting Charlie Kirk was shot. I will be kind, though. No matter how vile a person is, this has to stop. Gun violence needs to stop. Now.
- Reposted by Kym Kral
- My orange cat plays fetch with me every time I’m on the toilet. It’s truly delightful and weird and exactly the best thing to do while going to the bathroom.
- I don’t need my iPhone to recognize me with a mask or sunglasses on. I need it to recognize me while I’m crying.
- Just drove by one of those Tesla diners. I had no idea my vagina could dry up that quickly.
- Reposted by Kym KralNew episode of @conspiracytheshow.bsky.social! @adamtodbrown.bsky.social welcomes comedians @kymkral.bsky.social and Sam Sweets to wonder out loud about why Trump is so scared of the wind. Get it here: Spotify: creators.spotify.com/pod/profile/... Apple: podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/w...
- Reposted by Kym KralLook, I know we’re all pretty disappointed, but as long as he continues to take medical advice from RFK Jr, the light at the end of the tunnel is closer than it appears.
- I just got a new vitamin case that I am also excited VERY about. This is 40.
- I haven’t had this much fun on the internet since the Elon/Trump breakup. I can’t help but wonder, because all the other distraction tactics haven’t worked, is this just another one?! #releasetheepsteinfiles
- Reposted by Kym KralTrump and Hitler are different because Hitler shot himself and Trump shat himself.
- I grew up in Littleton. I didn’t go to Columbine but I lost a friend in that shooting. The shooting that should have changed everything. If you still don’t think we need major gun reform , you're either deeply stupid or a very bad person. We need stricter gun laws now. Period.
- The reason I, as a full-blown adult woman, still believe that the concept of Toy Story is real is that inanimate objects are VERY annoying when you’re in a hurry or in a bad mood.