Sarah Armento
journalist/writer/horror enthusiast. guitar player. robot from 1984. portland.
Short story “A Special Report” up now at Andromeda Magazine: andromedamagazine.com/2024/11/01/a-specia…
- Reposted by Sarah Armentoi am trying not to joke about the Epstein stuff because it's so horrible but there's also this ridiculous element where it's like... discovering Dracula is real, he's taken over human society at the highest levels, he's involved in tons of evil and also he's a huge dipshit
- Reposted by Sarah Armentoit’s genuinely reassuring to me that this is the most miserable and paranoid person in the entire world
- There is a light on upstairs that I am certain I did not switch on myself. So either the house is haunted or the cats have finally figured out how to turn on the lights.
- Either way, I don’t wanna deal with this, I got enough on my plate already
- Gotta go back to work tomorrow
- I took a four day weekend to clean and redecorate my place a little. It didn’t fix me but I do feel about 60% less awful than I did at the end of last week.
- The cat fur on the stairs has overwhelmed my vacuum cleaner. I am at an impasse.
- New chair is very popular.
- LOOK WHAT THE TUXEDO BASTARD DID TO GEORGE. SEE HOW HE BUTCHERED MY BOY.
- Reposted by Sarah Armentothe Epstein files make it very clear why the MeToo backlash was so extreme and why so much of elite society preferred Donald Trump ruling us like a king to the barest hint of accountability
- The six-week period between New Year’s and Valentines Day is truly the asshole of the year
- Reposted by Sarah Armentolook you actually can't tell how brilliant someone is by how they communicate via shorthand. you should judge someone's intelligence holistically, and when we do that for Jeffrey Epstein we can honestly say the man was pretty stupid
- Reposted by Sarah Armentothere are no mastermind villains. every single one of them is sending 4th grade level emails to World's Most Famous Sex Criminal from their work account
- Reposted by Sarah ArmentoLearning that I have won more Emmys than Bill Maher (1)
- Going to therapy in a bit. Looking forward to it in the same way I look forward to vomiting when I’m too nauseous to stand up.
- Reposted by Sarah ArmentoI don't know why they need to make short AI films about the American Revolution when the perfect one was created 18 years ago www.youtube.com/watch?v=sbRo...
- Reposted by Sarah ArmentoI think about this post at least once a week
- Reposted by Sarah Armentomy entire adult life, dem leadership class snatching defeat from the jaws of victory, endlessly; getting mugged then running after the bully saying "hey you missed this 5 dollar bill." I'd call them clowns but that would be insulting to clowns. Jeebus I'm sick of their weak, cowardly uselessness.
- I introduced a friend to the term "cuck chair" so I think I can call it a day.
- I think standing in the middle of the street and screaming FUCK YOU into the void might fix me
- Reposted by Sarah Armentoyeah man
- Reposted by Sarah ArmentoI'm getting reports that Greg Bovino has placed a crisp dollar on a toothpick and is now sailing out of town on a leaf
- Reposted by Sarah ArmentoWe need a better term for depression. That’s played out. I suggest the Noble Sorrow™️
- Reposted by Sarah ArmentoAnd, tonight, the network's flagship news program -- 60 Minutes -- ran a clip show of old celeb interviews to "celebrate the movies" rather than put together an episode focused on what's going on in Minnesota.
- Reposted by Sarah Armentothinking about Mr. Rogers "look for the helpers" quote and I see the helpers and the helpers are being shot in the fucking head
- Reposted by Sarah ArmentoHave never been to Minnesota in my life but I grew up with MST3K playing on a loop on my computer and that does a weird thing to your brain where you’re like “why do I know what Menards is?”
- Reposted by Sarah ArmentoMinnesotans are showing the soul of the United States to the world.
- Reposted by Sarah ArmentoWe have been told for nearly 30 years that America needed to tolerate mass shootings because the broad availability of guns would help us defend ourselves from an overreaching federal government. That day has come. The people who said this are supporting the federal agents. Many have joined them.
- Fucking evergreen
- Reposted by Sarah ArmentoThis article is like if They Might Be Giants found God, then went to Applebee's on an entire pharmacy's worth of quaaludes.
- Couldn’t remember Jacob Elordi’s name so I called him “Swole McCartney”
- I'm starting to think being angry and sad all the time might be bad for my mental health
- I'm shocked to learn that the new Silent Hill movie sucks just as much or more than the other two. Who could have foreseen that the director of the first godawful movie would churn out another massive turd.
- I'm in a bad mood. All must suffer.
- Reposted by Sarah ArmentoI should never have eaten those Chinese shrooms, now I see Greg Bovino everywhere
- With most psychedelic drugs, you never know what you're going to get. But this mysterious mushroom from China - without fail - causes users to hallucinate tiny people: crawling up walls, popping out from under furniture and marching under doors. www.bbc.com/future/artic...
- I like the new Arctic Monkeys single more than I thought I would. Better than anything on their last two albums anyway.
- I should go to bed but lying down in the dark with just my own thoughts to keep me company is pretty much the last thing I want to do right now.
- THIS THREAD IS INSANE
- Reposted by Sarah ArmentoCOW TOOLS COW TOOLS COW TOOLS
- Reposted by Sarah Armento"the guy pooping in the reservoir is criticized by both sides, therefore he must be doing something right" please use your fucking brain
- Reposted by Sarah ArmentoWhen the racist meme becomes national policy
- When I was growing up in Veneta, my mom and I regularly drove 20-30 minutes to Eugene/Springfield to see movies. I'm so sick of rich dipshits who don't know how the real world works.
- Reposted by Sarah Armentoayyyy i’m postin’ hole ova heyuhh
- I was watching short documentaries about disasters and the algorithm recommended a video about the making of The Lone Ranger (2013)
- Reposted by Sarah Armentoprotestors have painted what appears to be a tunnel on the side of the mountain, causing ICE agents to run into the mountain at full speed. disgusting.
- Reposted by Sarah Armento"Officers threw flash bangs and tear gas in my car. I got six kids in the car" "His wife, Destiny Jackson, told FOX 9 their 6-month-old infant stopped breathing and lost consciousness. She then performed CPR on her baby."
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- Reposted by Sarah ArmentoKoh: Trump has now spent $30 billion from the last bill for 10,000 more I.C.E. Agents that are going to be on the streets. That $30 billion would cover all the ACA subsidies for a year. It would eliminate all co-pays for prescription drugs for people from a year, and eliminate all medical debt.
- Lowkey my favorite gag in the movie
- Reposted by Sarah ArmentoWhen the fascist government says "Send us a list of all your Jews," that's not --- historically --- a "good" thing. www.theguardian.com/us-news/2026...
- Reposted by Sarah ArmentoI Photoshop Paddington into a movie, TV show, or pop culture until I forget: Day 1765
- I look at the news and I feel like I’m going insane. It’s a difficult time to work in a newsroom.

- Reposted by Sarah ArmentoWe visited Renee Good's memorial. There, we met a group of Somali Minnesotans — who too have been viciously attacked for weeks — warmly hosting everyone. Flowers & stuffed animals galore. Neighbors continually offering sambusas & hand-warmers & water. Grief. And belief. Scenes from Minneapolis:
- This is a good thread. Bad as things may be, succumbing to doomerism isn’t going to help anyone.
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- Reposted by Sarah Armentowhole lot of ICE pricks just saw that they can murder someone and not only not be arrested, but the president will call them a hero who saved the day. they even have a blueprint for how to shoot people they want to. extremely bad precedent
- Reposted by Sarah ArmentoKristi Noem is uniquely ghoulish among regime officials because for her this is one long Real Housewives season and she's the star
- Reposted by Sarah Armento[This post could not be retrieved]
- Reposted by Sarah ArmentoStayed up so I could be angry longer.
- Reposted by Sarah Armentoim sorry i know it sucks but journalists are going to have to be willing to get fired for simply describing what they see happening with their own eyes, you look like fucking morons
- GIVE PANOS ALL THE MONEY
- Reposted by Sarah Armento“ChatGPT started coaching Sam on how to take drugs, recover from them and plan further binges. It gave him specific doses of illegal substances, and in one chat, it wrote, ‘Hell yes—let’s go full trippy mode’” www.sfgate.com/tech/article...
- Me, extremely tired after working Saturday: Do I have to take the tree down today? Maybe I’ll leave it up through the Epiphany. *checks date* Aw fuck.
- The cats are rioting upstairs
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- Reposted by Sarah Armentohey remember when a bunch of middle-aged drunk korean lawmakers climbed the locked gates to the national assembly to hold an emergency session after the president gave illegal orders to the military, all of which ended with said president being sentenced to prison
- Reposted by Sarah ArmentoIt would be nice if the most powerful man in the world and the worst man in the world were different people
- Reposted by Sarah ArmentoMy God, how did we get here? How could this have possibly happ... Oh, wait, I remember.
- I make a lot of grim jokes about how there are never any consequences for any of this evil shit but Jesus Christ there need to be some fucking consequences
- Fuck.
- Reposted by Sarah ArmentoCanada: Our Prime Minster studied at Oxford and Harvard, was the Governor of both the Banks of England and Canada, and is recognized as one of the sharpest financial minds around. America: oh yeah? Our guy has to take dementia tests every week.
- Reposted by Sarah Armentomillennial king
- There are lots of indie theaters in Portland and one of them should totally do this
- Reposted by Sarah ArmentoExtremely funny to call the pope “holier-than-thou”
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- Reposted by Sarah ArmentoWeiss is bad at this. It’s too big a stage. She’s the Kash Patel of journalism
- I’m a fan of this new sports subgenre “annoying bastards getting pummeled by pro boxers” and would like to see more content in that vein
- Reposted by Sarah Armentowell well well if it isn’t the blowjob brothers
- Reposted by Sarah ArmentoIt's such a tell on all these people that they saw Epstein as the perfect embodiment of urbane decadence. He couldn't spell, he had little sex competitions with gutter misogynists, his interior design sense was awful, there is no evidence whatsoever that he was smart or funny
- I've seen a couple people say Conan is complicit in what happened, and that doesn't sit right with me. It's easy with hindsight to say that he made the wrong decision, and I'm sure that will haunt him for a long time (word is he's wracked with guilt) but Nick is responsible for his own actions.
- Reposted by Sarah ArmentoHad the three Dems who voted for this held the line and voted no, they could have blocked it.
- The House passed legislation today that would charge doctors with a felony punishable by up to 10 years in prison for providing transition-related care to minors. Rep. Sarah McBride strongly condemned the legislation in rare personal remarks ahead of the vote. www.nbcnews.com/politics/tru...
- This speech is giving me psychic damage
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