Waffle Coffee
"annoying woke twat"
fresh shite:
https://bsky.app/profile/did:plc:ahmxpqmwql6cdadznduflgot/feed/aaad54gcxcjro
polished turds:
https://bsky.app/profile/did:plc:ahmxpqmwql6cdadznduflgot/feed/aaaciatrdxzmm
County Galway 🇮🇪
- die hard is NOT a christmas movie...
- die hard is a black friday movie...
- die hard is a thanksgiving movie...
- die hard is a bonfire night movie... (in the UK)
- die hard is a halloween movie...
- Reposted by Waffle CoffeeA lint roller but for my life
- "oh yeah? well how about you 'everlasting gobstopper' on these you fucking weirdo" charlie said, stuffing another oompa loompa bollock into wonka's mouth...
- Reposted by Waffle Coffeelet’s flood the house with carbon monoxide, make love, pass out sex-drunk & call it a life
- Reposted by Waffle CoffeeActually, how even did Gwyneth Paltrow get away with selling that candle? Like if there was a Robert DeNiro candle called, “This Smells Like My Penis” it would be borderline sex offense.
- Reposted by Waffle CoffeeBut have you tried a comically large sandwich about it?
- Reposted by Waffle CoffeeI got filter straws for the apocalypse so who wants to come over and drink the creek water behind my house with me to see if they work
- Reposted by Waffle CoffeeIn my experience you should shut the fuck up
- die hard is a labour day movie...
- float like poop in a hot tub, sting like wasabi in your lube...
- Reposted by Waffle CoffeeHere to judge the skeets
- Reposted by Waffle Coffeethe story about pinocchio's nose growing longer was all a lie
- Reposted by Waffle CoffeeI’m wearing lots and lots of clothes -me flirting
- Reposted by Waffle Coffeeworm in my apple, thought of you
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- Reposted by Waffle CoffeeNot to brag but I haven’t acted like a psycho once today
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- Reposted by Waffle CoffeePeople that understand sarcasm are the real heroes.
- Reposted by Waffle CoffeeSorry about the jizz on your ceiling It’s been a while
- Reposted by Waffle CoffeeMarty Mcfly: a time machine? Lets go back in time and stop Hitler Doc Brown: oooor we could help your dad fuck your mom
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- *makes bruce lee noises as i cum*
- Reposted by Waffle CoffeeA good way to get out of a conversation is to take off one shoe and hit the person who’s talking over the head.
- Reposted by Waffle Coffee*rides my bike in front of your house in a sundress while sucking on a lollipop until you notice me
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- Reposted by Waffle CoffeeSliced up some poppyseed bread for breakfast. So obviously I now have to sell the apartment.
- Reposted by Waffle Coffeewake me up when they make hustling less work
- Reposted by Waffle CoffeeEeyore: Why does everyone hate me, Pooh. Pooh: Come with me, let’s walk… Eeyore: Where are we going, Pooh? Pooh: To the cliff. It’s pretty there. Eeyore: Will I feel better? Pooh: We will Eeyore. We will
- Reposted by Waffle CoffeeIf you can't laugh at yourself who can you laugh at? Literally anyone
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- Reposted by Waffle CoffeeThought of you.
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- Reposted by Waffle Coffeeplease do not howitzer the clitoris it’s very special
- Reposted by Waffle CoffeeYou might fool me once with that follow followback Unfollow bullshit but no more than six times
- Reposted by Waffle CoffeeYou too can try Dubai chocolate for around $10 for 3 servings or save money instead by buying a Cadbury bar and adding sand.
- Reposted by Waffle CoffeeI’ll do that thing that you never talk about and keep hidden deep inside.
- Reposted by Waffle CoffeeThought I was depressed. Turns out I just needed to replace the batteries in my vibrator.
- an american tail is about a little russian mouse who is sick & tired of snow & techno music & everything tasting like dill so he sets sail for america but his ship sinks & he has to share a door with a posh lady who makes him paint her tits or some shit i don't fucking know - anti cat propaganda ⭐⭐⭐
- superman stars christopher reeve who gets bitten by a radioactive mafia bloke & gets superpowers like being able to put on a leotard in a phone box & becoming completely unrecognisable just by taking off his glasses or some shit i don't fucking know - spiderman for people who don't like spiders ⭐⭐⭐⭐
- Reposted by Waffle CoffeeWhen did eyebrows become sentient because yours are giving me the heebie jeebies.
- Reposted by Waffle Coffeea golden girls tv/movie crossover: thread
- Reposted by Waffle CoffeeMe: these edibles ain’t shit 20m later: WOAH the moon is huuuge tonight wtf😮
- Reposted by Waffle CoffeeI already resemble a Bond villain, it’s time to go all in.
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- Reposted by Waffle CoffeeSure boobs are great but when a woman is speaking please have some respect and look her directly in the vagina
- Reposted by Waffle CoffeeI just had a really long conversation with myself and we figured out that I’m not crazy
- this skeet could have been a sigh...
- Reposted by Waffle CoffeeIncreasingly I notice people putting a question mark at the end of a statement and it upsets me because I don't know why this is happening?
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