Mommy Shortlegs
she/her
first person to bring a hamster to the top of Mt Everest
- don't call it an everything shower if you didn't jack off in there
- idk why UPS has to lie about severe weather, just say your short staffed like the rest of us dawg
- [trying to console a crying friend] "Do you wanna, uhhhh. smoke some weed about it?"
- I know nobody asked but I'm 5
- which Ren Höek are you today
- logging into Facebook, immediately calling an ex coworker a racist, illiterate cousin fucker, logging out of Facebook
- reading this made my brain short circuit so hard I had to hit ctrl+alt+del
- Reposted by Mommy ShortlegsHow can someone have all this and be unhappy
- I mean yeah I'm usually not the smartest person in the room but I'm rarely the least smart either. I'm basically like "knows what a pipette is but doesn't do any pipetting" level smart
- oh so you mean to tell me that Stuart Skinner may not have been the problem? is that what you're trying to say right now?
- idk if Pocket Full of Sunshine is ever not stuck in my head. like even when it's not playing consciously I'm pretty sure it's still faintly bopping away in the nether recesses of my brain
- the coworker whose locker is right above mine passed away on Saturday and I know it's just the natural order of things but still the gasp I gusped tonight when I rolled up to my locker and someone new was putting their stuff away above me 😔
- when I get home I'm making a big ole sammich
- Reposted by Mommy Shortlegsthis ended nancy maces career
- Jesus Christ boys this show is so good. I have rewatched this series like 800 times and yet it's still just banger after banger
