Caffinatedkitti
🌙 Villain Life Coach 🌙
I think I’m funny
✨Professionally Confrontational ✨
Mainly active on clock app 😮💨
Pfp by @10000_jeong_
- An update from the Your Body My Choice, Right? merch sales 💃🏻
- Takopi’s original sin spoiler- Tbh Shizuka being solely motivated and after her dog, not caring what else is going on around her, or the people involved and crashing TF out when she still can’t reunite with her dog is so real.
- Part 2: A slow approach generally makes them only move away by an inch or two so you can tell where they are on your head and go to a nearby structure and lean your head on it so they can exit. Or you can walk around with a spider hat- dealer’s choice.
- Part 1: Pro tip: if a large spider falls on your head because you’re prone to “spider hour” walks in wooded areas: If you swipe at it instinctively the spider will scatter all over the place and potentially get tangled in your hair.
- I’m devastated- this was my favorite glass 😭 if anyone helps me find the artist and get a new one, I’ll find you a dubiously sourced kidney. I think I got it from Metrocon in Florida circa 2022?? Maybe?? I don’t know but I’m sad.
- People ask how I learned I could talk, laugh etc without moving my face and the true story is I was talking to myself and noticed my face wasn’t moving in a wall mirror.
- One time a guy had a seizure during a party at my place and when the paramedics came I convinced them to get in my coffin. “When’s the next time you’re gonna get to try one out. That you’ll remember at least. Don’t worry- you’ll fit. It’s made for men.”
- The emotional support lettuce was a success
- Will acts of terror occur? Yuh probably. But realistically you should be more concerned about your local white man going on a personal rampage. It’s statistically way more likely.
- Don’t fall for the “sleeper cell” bullshit. It just the Red Scare but in a newer, tackier, and ironically red hat. It’ll be used and sensationalized to push for Islamophobia and Arab “deportations” in the states.
- TikTok’s algorithm seems to think I’m part of the dead dad club this Father’s Day. I’m afraid not 😮💨 The one thing I inherited from him was the “lasted way longer than they probably should have” gene. I’ll give the guy that much, he’s definitely been annoyingly durable >:T
- Why did no one tell me there is a Madoka Magica ass Drowsy Pokemon card??? Step aside prismatics I want this beauty
- 🌙: the scariest ghost movie for me was The Grudge. ☀️: I find that so interesting. Perhaps we fear what is reflected I’m still trying to unpack what that means
- The most reliable thing in my life is wafflehouse’s power to make me take a dump within 20 minutes of leaving the store
- I had to get all new tires because mine were rotted
- An honor and a delight 🌙🍄
- FYI there’s some kind of scam where “podcast reps” reach out get you on an established podcast, always sponsored by a brand or meta itself and offering a few thousand for the opportunity. Idk what the end goal is, but after I messed with one for a while I can say they’re definitely nefarious.
- I woke up with one hell of a hankering for soup
- The ironic part is I really don’t even use Reddit that much.
- This is my pokemon team line up btw The abra isn’t really for combat. Our psychic link has her teleport us out whenever I get annoyed and want to leave. Or if I lose a battle and want to avoid paying up.
- Oh me oh my. A LOLsuit update www.tiktok.com/t/ZP8YE7u5M/
- I woke myself up laughing- I can’t remember the joke but it was apparently a good one.
- My friend said I have headless mannequin energy
- Nothing better happen to Neil the Seal
- 👨🦲: honestly you’re coming across as so condescending and rude when I’m just trying to educate you. 🌙: well thank Satan that my tone is coming across correctly even via text- it so often can be lost 😮💨 can’t have you thinking I’m respecting your input.
- Blueballs isn’t a real medical condition. It’s a term used as a coercion tactic solely to get sex/ otherwise guilt trip a partner or blame someone else for your sexual frustration 🫶 Can you feel uncomfy from not popping the bottle? Yeah! But to cry “Blue balls” is really just an attempt to coerce 🫡
- Men get big mad when I mention I’m asexual. I get that you guys are stuck with a ducttape raft you can’t even get to the surf while I’m letting a dream yacht rust- but you need to understand some of us just aren’t interested in sailing 🤷🏻♀️ don’t get mad at me because you can’t get your dingy wet.
- The terms are nonnegotiable
- I was overtaken by the spirit of the Levan Polka Leekspin from like 2009 (specifically the version done by the first YouTuber I ever followed but she’s since unlisted hers, so I made my own with my duck brother mods. Not the usual stuff I know- but I have my own fun.
- Me: I’ve never understood being brought to tears over musi- *Laika Party Plays* Me:
- You guys wanna see something funny?
- I’m not suprised the guy behind Terrifier is “anti politics in media” (we all know what that means) Like he’s definitely making a political statement by giving his most extended/worst death sequences to his female characters. Men get it rough in that franchise as well, buuut you notice a treeend
- Oh hey my birthday is ambiguously soon
- Update! We’re a little over $400 🫡 I’ll do an update on tiktok and hopefully that’ll push us over the $500 to fund a whole deletus procedure ✨
- We’re up to 361.66 to donate to planned parenthood from the “your body my choice” design 🫡 trying to raise up enough to fund a whole Deletus Fetus procedure which is somewhere between $400-580 from what I gather www.redbubble.com/i/sticker/Yo...
- Keep an unused and sealed reusable menstrual product in your emergency bag- if you wanna be a girls’ girl pack an unused sealed spare. Even if you usually use tampons and pads- get a reusable option and keep it in your emergency supplies.
