I think this came across as like... That I struggle to have fun with stuff. No!!! I have a lot of fun!
But the consequence of growing up is awareness of those external motivators. How am I doing this, why am I doing this, what is the potential risk/benefit of this... philosophical shit.
I hope that I can at some point in my adult life do something for fun without secondary motives
That is one thing that felt true of childhood that I don't expect to relive but I think would be really healthy for me.
Jan 7, 2026 23:42