✨ kaye 🪲📿🍁
⚜️ 30+, she/her. chronic writer of adult bedtime stories ✨🧿
⚜️ ko-fi: ko-fi.com/blackeyedblonde
⚜️ minors please do not follow or engage 🔞👋 18+ content
- this is not a humble brag, more about my eternal despair, but: I know people mean it as a compliment when they leave comments on my fanfics saying "you should be a published author" & "if you aren't published by now I'd be shocked" but I have to tell you it causes me immense guilt and woe, etc
- like it's nice to have total strangers believe in my ability as a writer but nobody saying that knows that I feel like a failure for getting my BA in creative writing. nobody knows I've applied to my county library system 75+ times and never gotten a job. I failed to get into a MFA program 3 times!
- my creative writing 'talent' is simultaneously the only finely honed 'skill' I have and also a Sisyphean yoke around my neck. I have been consistently sharing my writing with the world for over a decade but no, I'm not a published author. I have not been successful. and it haunts me every single day
-
View full threadI'm so glad I unknowingly posted this deeply personal crashout post at the same moment as the official good omens account posted a new teaser for S3. because of course 🤦♀️ the endless laugh track of my life
- my mother, who knows I've consistently been publishing fanfic online since 2014, told me today that she thinks writing fic is no better than having AI write it "because the characters don't belong to you" and I nearly fist fought her in the front seat of the fucking car while we were in traffic
- I LOVE BEING FUNDAMENTALLY MISUNDERSTOOD AND MISCONSTRUED BY EVERY SINGLE PERSON IN MY LIFE, EVEN BY THE PEOPLE WHO MATTER TO ME MOST!!!!!!!! AND I'LL NEVER KNOW THE LOVING GAZE AND AFFECTION OF SOMEBODY WHO SEES ME FOR WHO I TRULY AM AND WHAT MATTERS TO ME 😃
- this is the first year in memory where I haven't written the wrong date on any documents. like my brain just naturally moved to 2026 and never once fumbled 🤔