Mr. Chonkers
I’m just a little baby.
- This is one of those batshit insane liberals I encounter all the time that other liberals insist aren’t real. Not wanting to suck lady dick makes you an incel, even though they’re the one who feels entitled to sex.
- I feel like we're a few months away from MAGA claiming Trump isn't a rapists because the age of consent in the US Virgin Islands is 15. It isn't, but I don't think that will stop them from saying it.
- Sidney Sweeney is just Jarred Leto with boobs
- Decades of fucking neurodivergent people repeatedly telling me the polar opposite of what they want then blowing up at me later for giving them what asked for has done irreversible psychological damage to me that I’m never going to recover from.
- SOCIALISM ❌ SOCIAL JISM ✅
- Actually it’s only anarchy if it’s from the anarch religion of France, otherwise it’s just sparkling failed state.
- If I had a nickel for every time a former CIA asset carried out a terrorist attack against the US that the government subsequently used to accumulate more power I’d have [REDACTED] nickels.
- Don’t believe a word she says, she’s a lion ass bitch…
- The more I think about it, Sally Fields character in Mrs. Doubtfire is the real villain. Her husband refuses to encourage kids to smoke, instead of waiting for him to find a new job she throws him out and spends hundreds of dollars a week to hire a nanny, and she refuses to let him see his kids.
- Imagine trying to do a leveraged buyout in medieval Europe. You go to the town goldsmith, take out a massive loan in the blacksmiths name, sell his anvils and hammers, then make him pay rent for his own shop.
- MAGA thinks this is a flex.
- Republicans when someone who’s paid under $16k receives $7 a day on food stamps.
- Obama: (sips beer) Fox News: NEW CALLS TO IMPEACH FORMER PRESIDENT OBAMA AFTER HE WAS CAUGHT RED HANDED VIOLATING THE 18th AMENDMENT…
- Why is this so hard for maga to understand? If the government has the power to track political dissidents and take them out before they commit attacks then your “well regulated militia” is useless against tyrannical governments.
- Shooter manifestos be like “I love Trump!” Fox news be like “the shooter described homosexual feelings for an older man…”
- Con: melting ice caps will destroy coastal cities. Pro: 80 degrees in October means Halloween costumes will be slutty af…
- Hey guys, how long after a married woman unfriends her husband/drops her relationship status, should you wait before you start sending her 3am drunk texts? I want to be respectful, you know?
- Months from now: “…a batch of contaminated Tylenol has been recalled…” MAGA: YOU ALL LAUGHED AT TRUMP BUT HE WAS RIGHT ALL ALONG!
- Going after food coloring and Tylenol while trying to remove regulations against asbestos and sulfur dioxide is the most on brand move the Trump administration could possibly make.
- Me at my first boxing match: WOW I knocked that guy out with one punch… The other boxer: uh yeah that was the ref, you’re actually not supposed to punch them..
- It’s actually funny jimmy Kimmel got away with doing black face multiple times but got cancelled for pointing out Trump was more concerned with the construction of a ball room than the death of a friend.
- As much as I hate social media algorithms for destroying attention spans and radicalizing extremists, the one transgression I can’t ever forgive is convincing neurotic people its everyone else’s responsibility to predict and manage their emotions.
- Me as jigsaw: in order to survive this game you have to set a clearly articulated set of boundaries and attempt to enforce them before randomly flipping out at people… Neurodivergent person: everything is fine, don’t worry…(Skull ripped open) Me: goddamn, 5th time in a row…
